Defiled Holy Act

Here's an interesting question.
If a terrorist puts a bomb in his underwear, doesn't that defile it and prevent it from being an act of holy Jihad?  Wouldn't that disqualify his martyrdom?
If anyone knows the pertinent verses from the Quran, I would be interested.

Just How Stupid CAN A Government Be?

     On NPR yesterday, they were discussing the problems that local Social Services have tracking and helping the homeless.  Some people living in shelters have been waiting SEVEN YEARS for Section 8 housing.  Here's the catch:
     Let's say you are homeless.  Let's say you are on the waiting list for Section 8 housing.  They contact you.  You have maybe 30 days to respond.  If you do not respond, they drop you off of the waiting list.  Sounds reasonable, right?
     Hold on.  By Federal regulations, the Social Services office is only allowed to contact you BY MAIL!  If you don't respond to the letter they send you, you will be dropped off of the list!  Where did you receive you letter?  HELLO...  You are HOMELESS!
     The Federal Government has recently realized that the mail requirement was unnecessarily restrictive, so they have relaxed the restrictions on the method of contact.  Social Workers are now allowed to contact potential Section 8 recipients by EMAIL.  !?!
     KA...BOOM!  ...  (That was the sound of my head exploding.)
     These people are homeless.  They don't have a mailing address. But, all they have to do is go to their local Starbucks, log in on their laptops, and check their email.  Sure, that ought to do it.
     Don't you know, the government is going to fix ALL of our problems...  BUT ONLY IF WE ACT NOW, WE CAN'T AFFORD TO WAIT!  (Seems like I heard somebody say that on TV.)

Reality Check: Global Warming

     In engineering, it is often very difficult to clearly define the forces on a particular piece of machinery. To evaluate the integrity of a design in the early stages, it is necessary to make general assumptions about load cases and operating conditions. Even when all of the loads are known exactly, it is frequently very difficult to analyze accurately because of the complexity of the mechanism or the shapes of the components.
     When faced with overwhelming complexity and uncertainty, engineers do what is called a 'Reality Check'.
     Take the most grossly oversimplified case imaginable just to get an idea of the correct order of magnitude of the problem.
     Here is a reality check for Global Warming. This is not intended to be a comprehensive treatment, just a 'reality check' to establish the order of magnitude of the problem. I used Wikipedia's 'Greenhouse Effect' as a reference. All of the 'assumed' values are credited and footnoted there.
     The Black Body Temperature of the Earth is 5.5 degrees C. Based on black body radiation, the mean temperature of the Earth should be -19 degrees C. Instead, it is +14 degrees C. Broadly generalizing, the net Greenhouse Effect causes global warming of 33 degrees C.
     Carbon Dioxide makes up approximately 10% of the total greenhouse gases. Therefore, Carbon Dioxide contributes to global warming of about 3.3 degrees C.
     Pre-industrial Carbon Dioxide content (from ice cores) is about 300PPM (parts per million). The maximum levels of Carbon Dioxide have been measured at about 383PPM. Therefore, man's contribution to Carbon Dioxide production is about 83/383, or about 20%. That sounds like a lot, but wait!
     That 20% is 20% of 10% of the TOTAL greenhouse gases. Man's ENTIRE 'Carbon Footprint' is only 2/10 of 1% of total greenhouse gases (.002).
     0.002 x 33 degrees C = 0.006 degrees C.
     0.006 degrees C = 0.12 degrees F.
     If humans were completely removed from the planet, the global warming would decrease by 0.12 degrees F.
     NOW, how excited can you get about billions of dollars to produce a change that will be too small to even measure - a change that is no change at all.  Do you really want change?

1995 F-150 E4OD Transmission Hard Shifting

     I had a very weird and scary situation this week with my truck. Even though it has 360,000 miles on it, it had been running fine.  All of a sudden, it started shifting hard.  I don't even have gas money this week.  I was afraid I would have to find another $1600 for a transmission overhaul.
     Exact symptoms:
     1. Hard shifting in every gear no matter how lightly loaded.
     2. Doesn't shift as hard under heavier load.
     3. Sometimes 'catches' or 'bumps' in reverse - like a delay before engaging or something.
     4. No slipping in any gear or at speed.
     5. A slight whine (I thought it was some other little car nearby).
     I looked at all of the Ford troubleshooting threads without finding anything but horror stories and bad news.  I finally found someone who had exactly my symptoms on a snowplow website!  It seems that I had recently pulled a heavily loaded trailer.  When the computer detected the slippage due to the heavier load, it applied full line pressure to clamp the clutches and bands tighter.  It never reset itself.
     I disconnected the battery for 30 minutes.  The computer reset.  It shifts as smoothly as new now.  Wow!
     Even if I could have found someone honest enough to check it and tell me what is wrong without arbitrarily rebuilding the whole transmission, it would still have cost me $50 to $100 minimum.  More likely, $300 or $400.
     God bless the internet and thank You for the word of knowledge.
     To everyone out there: do your research.  ...and always look one more time.  Good luck!

Everything has a price

The wise man built his house on the rock.  The rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock.

The foolish man built his house on the sand: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it fell. And great was its fall.

The wise man continued to make his house payments on time, but the government and the economic times made it more and more difficult.  The burden was great, for great had been the cost of anchoring to the rock.

The foolish man let the bank foreclose and walked away.

And the moral of the story is...  uh...  Hold on, give me a minute...

Zenith DTT900 HD Converter Box

Tech Tips from the In-House Engineer

As you might have already realized, most electronic devices do not really have an OFF condition, they just 'go to sleep' until something tells them to 'wake up'.  Any device with a remote control, in particular, can never be OFF.  If it was OFF, how could it respond to the remote control to turn ON?

This is not usually a problem - the power usage is minuscule and the devices are ready to respond when you want them without physically having to push a bunch of switches.  The process is usually so reliable that some manufacturers no longer include a real OFF/ON switch.  (There is no need for it.  Right?)  A real physical switch costs money and serves no purpose.  Yeah, right.  Anyone who has had to 'push the button' on their computer knows better.

The Zenith DTT900 HD Converter Box has a problem which reminds us that OFF/ON switches always have a real purpose.  At first, the problem seems to be connected to power outages or electrical storms, but now it just seems random.  About once a week, the box stops responding to the remote control.  It is still ON and still receiving whatever channel it is set on, but...  It will not change channels.  It will not change volume.  But, most importantly, IT WON'T TURN OFF!  Even pushing the 'real on/off switch' on the front of the box doesn't work because IT ISN'T A REAL SWITCH!

I'm sorry, you have probably guessed the punch line to this joke.  The only way to reset the operating system of this computer (yeah... It's a computer.) is to TURN IT OFF!  In this case, turning it off means unplugging it.  Of course, since it is installed in an entertainment center, all of the electric cords are conveniently and esthetically well-hidden and inaccessible.  In my case, near the ceiling.

After having to precariously stand on a chair (Don't try this at home?  Where else would we NEED to try this?) for the 4th or 5th time, I finally decided that problem was consistently recurrent and required fixing.  I put one of those switched extension cords in line with the HD cord so I could have a real switch where I could get to it.  A real low-tech solution for my high-tech device.  They should be readily available in any low-tech discount store, especially now since they are frequently used to switch Christmas lights.

Remember, sometimes low-tech is better.  Paper may cover Rock, but Rock can beat the crap out of Paper later.

Update 12/6/2012 It just died completely.  I wonder what will be wrong with the next one...

Don't Cry Anymore

   Most Christians understand (intellectually, at least) that there is a distinction between happiness and joy.  Joy is somehow a spiritual characteristic and happiness is carnal.
   The Cathedral Quartet put it most dramatically in the song Romans 8:28:
       Now Satan can rob me of my happiness
       But he can't take away my joy
   But most people would be hard pressed to give a clear example of the distinction.
   In 1992, I was driving through a run-down neighborhood.  I passed a little girl who was sitting on the curb with her head in her hands.  This song immediately came to me:

Don't Cry Anymore

       Don't Cry Anymore,
       Everything will be all right.
       Jesus loves you,
       And He wants you to know,
       That you're special to HIm.

       So dry your tears,
       And give your fears to Him.
       __ ___ ____ ___
       And let the healing begin.


   The song came to me as fast as I could write it down -- with the exception of the one missing line.  What was missing?  What else do we have to do to enable God's healing?  I could not come up with an answer.
   About a week or two weeks later, I was almost killed in a car wreck.  I was in the hospital for 21 days.  I was in a lot of pain most of that time and there had been a significant possibility that I might lose a leg.  My personal foundational scripture has always been Romans 8:28, "All things work together for good to them that love the Lord and are called according to His purposes."  Naturally, I was asking fervently, "WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED TO ME?" and "How does THIS work to my good?"
   Immediately - when I asked, "Why..." - the missing line in the song came to me:
       "Release your JOY
       "And let the healing begin!"
   The physical healing process took over a year.  But as far as I was concerned, I was spiritually healed immediately.  I have rarely felt as close to God as I did during those 21 days.  I was certainly NOT happy.  But I was never without joy.
   The Apostle Paul wrote letters to many of the churches while he was in prison in Rome. On several occasions he attempted to convey the dramatic distinction between happiness and joy.
   He was so excited by the joy of his relationship with God that forgot where he was and said, "I wish everybody could be just like I am."  [dramatic pause...]  "Oh... Except for these leg irons and this prison cell."
   I could honestly say, "I wish everyone could be just like me."  "Oh... Except for the crushed leg and all the pain and stuff..."
   The dramatic point that the Lord was trying to make was that joy comes first!  Our natural assumption is that the joy comes because of the healing.  But, that's not joy - that's happiness.  Joy comes straight from the Lord, regardless of the situation.  What God was saying was that Joy has to ALREADY BE THERE for healing to take place!

     Don't Cry Anymore,
     Everything will be all right.
     Jesus loves you,
     And He wants you to know,
     That you're special to HIm.

     So dry your tears,
     And give your fears to Him.
     RELEASE YOUR JOY!
     And let the healing begin.


     Don't Cry Anymore,
     Everything will be all right.
     Jesus loves you,
     And He wants you to know,
     That you're precious to HIm.

You Wouldn't Understand

     I am outraged and offended.
     I was listening to Terry Gross on Fresh Air (NPR) as she interviewed Uta Hagen, a once-famous actress who, with her husband, ran a famous acting school.  Terry started to ask her something about the way she prepared for a scene and she interrupted:
     "Let me stop you right there.  Are You an actor?"
     TG: "No."
     "Then it's none of your business."
     She went on to give examples:
     "You would not ask a violinist about his bowing arm.  ...about his elbow position.  ...about his phrasing."
     "If he told you, you would not know what he was talking about."
     Terry Gross, who is probably one of the best interviewers in the world, recovered very gracefully and went on to explain that she would ask exactly those questions.  Her business is to ask those questions.  She said, "Understanding more about (a) craft, helps me to perceive things about that craft that I would not have perceived before."
     In fact, studies have shown that any knowledge in any area of expertise increases general intelligence in other unrelated areas of expertise.  In other words, IQ is to some extent directly related to sheer volume of knowledge.  It is never wrong to seek knowledge in any area.  The Bible says that the wise seek knowledge because wisdom is based on knowledge.
     As an engineer/apostle/teacher, a primary part of my calling is to learn as much as I can about EVERYTHING.  To seek out correlations and interconnections between seemingly unrelated fields of study.  To convey as best I can the wonder and delight of my discoveries to as many others as possible.
     I do not believe that anything is impossible to explain.  You may not be able to explain it to someone else, but you will understand and appreciate what I am saying (if I am truly any kind of a teacher at all).  To appreciate the calling of a teacher, go watch Stand And Deliver, Dead Poets Society, or even School Of Rock!  A real teacher considers it his fault if the student cannot understand.
     As the interview continued, Uta Hagen talked about being blacklisted as a communist during the 60s.  She taught acting because she was not allowed to act.  I realized then that her response to the first interview question came from hurt and bitterness.
     Not really called to be a teacher -- only arrogance and bitterness makes the statement, "I could tell you, but it wouldn't do you any good.  You wouldn't understand."

The In-House Engineering Department

     I don't know how anybody can survive in the world today without an resident in-house engineer.  We have purchased very few items that did not soon require repair or redesign to satisfactorily perform the function that they were sold for.  Just this weekend, I had to repair a very expensive toilet that required functional redesign of a part and machine work on a lathe because the $5.00 part was obsolete and discontinued.  The lathe work required rewiring of the light fixture over the lathe.
     On my wife's immediate to-do list, there are items that will require welding, CNC machine work, wiring, and cabinet work.  Less immediate items may require industrial design, upholstery work, and landscape grading.
     How does everyone else out there survive without an engineering department, a licensed electrician, a parts stockroom in the basement, a machine shop, a cabinet shop, and a welding shop?

The Reincarnation Of Cats

I accidently ran across a weird program on the local communist radio station that featured a women who specialized in the reincarnation of animals.  Normally I would not have paid any attention at all to a program of this type.  This one caught my attention because she was specifically talking about cats.  (Did I mention that cats are a primary interest of mine?)  I even thought it was kind of funny when she said that she had had the same cat three or four times.  But I lost all respect for her when she said that sometimes cats will even come back as dogs!  I knew then that she had no knowledge of reincarnation OR cats.

If a cat ever came back as a dog, it would immediately hang itself nine times!

How Many Ways to Die Hard?

I have been counting how many Die Hard movies Bruce Willis has made.

I have come up with 15. How can there be 15?

1. There was Die Hard (1988) that started it all.
2. Die Hard 2.
3. Die Hard Singing (Hudson Hawk).
4. Die Hard in the ‘Hood (The Last Boy Scout).
5. Die Hard and Wet (Striking Distance).
6. Die Hard in Group (alternate title: Die Hard and Horny) (Color of Night).
7. Everybody Dies Hard (Pulp Fiction).
8. Die Hard: With a Vengence.
9. Die Hard in the Desert (Last Man Standing).
10. Die Hard in Space (The Fifth Element).
11. Die Hard on an Asteroid (Armageddon).
12. Can’t Hardly Die Hard (Unbreakable)
13. Retire or Die Hard (Hostage).
14. Live Free or Die Hard.
15. Virtually Die Hard (Surrogates).

I’m sure I missed several since most of them had alternate titles. These are just the ones I’ve seen. I don’t think guest spots on Friends or Ally McBeal count although many would argue that Moonlighting definitely counts (alternate title: Die Hard by Slow Torture).

I will add more to this list as they are discovered.

Know Yourself!

A Man has got to know his limitations - Clint Eastwood, Magnum Force.

As Harry Callahan demonstrated repeatedly throughout this movie, knowing who you are and what you are is critical to the way you live your life. You should take every opportunity to find out who you are, what your skills and limits are, and what your calling in life is.

In areas where I am not a recognized expert, I frequently give the impression of arrogance or overconfidence, when in fact I am often insecure and cautious. In everything that I do, I give the impression of great intelligence, skill, and speed - only because my struggles and deficiencies are all internal.

In many ways, I know exactly who I am. I know my calling. I know my personal purpose. I know my skills. I know my personality type. I know my physical limitations. People who know me have the impression that I can do anything. Because I know my limitations, I can work right up to the edge of those limitations.

People who do not know their limitations are usually afraid to get close to their limits. The average uninformed, unselfaware (I just made that word up) person probably works to about 50% of capacity. I know exactly where my limits are. I can work right up to those limits. Even in an area where I am only average, that means I look twice as good, right?
Know yourself!

It’s Complicated

My mama never told me to be a simple man,
She just told me to get good grades
So I wouldn’t have to dig ditches.
These are some of the things I have done.

Acted in a play
Arranged a marriage
Assembled furniture
Assigned duties
Assumed responsibility
Bailed out a canoe
Baled cotton
Built a box
Built a bridge
Built a house
Built a log hut
Built a robot
Buried a cat
Bushhogged a field
Camped in the woods
Cast out demons
Changed a tire
Changed an engine
Chopped down a tree
Climbed a building
Climbed a mountain
Climbed a tree
Cut a car in half with a hammer and chisel
Danced in church
Deciphered a code
Demolished a house
Designed a house
Developed a subdivision
Diagrammed a sentence
Differentiated an equation
Directed singing
Drew a 3-d model
Drove a forklift
Drove a tractor
Drove a truck
Dug a ditch
Edited a newsletter
Erected a steel structure
Executed a will
Fathered a child
Filtered a precipitant
Fired a gun
Flew in an airplane
Followed a compass
Forded a river
Forged a chain
Formed sheet metal
Glazed a window
Had a yard sale
Hand scraped a babbit bearing
Hand scraped lathe ways
Held 5 aces
Hiked 20 miles
Hung a door
Hung a picture
Invented a tool
Jumped off of a roof
Jumped in the deep end (and sank)
Killed a snake
Left the country
Loved a woman
Made a shirt
Made lamps out of old bottles
Managed a project
Manufactured explosives
Mixed concrete
Mowed a lawn
Opened an umbrella in the house
Operated a Bobcat
Ordered lunch
Painted a car
Painted a painting
Planted a tree
Played a tambourine
Played with matches
Plumbed a house
Poured grout
Preached a sermon
Programmed PLCs
Programmed VCRs
Pulled a trailer
Ran a lathe
Ran a milling machine
Ran a race
Ran with scissors
Rebuilt an engine
Replaced a front clip
Rode a mule
Rode a train
Roofed a house
Sang in church
Saw Rock City
Set anchor bolts
Sold something on eBay
Soldered a wire
Solved a riddle
Spliced a rope
Split logs
Taught a class
Threaded pipe
Tiled a floor
Titrated a solution
Tore down a barn
Towed a car
Typeset a book
Walked home in the snow
Walked under a ladder
Welded a pressure vessel
Went on a mission trip
Wired a house
Wired machinery
Won a science fair
Wrote a book
Wrote a song